Sherlock fandom is huddled in its shock blankets for a reason

[tardis_stowaway]

Last night, I pulled an all-nighter for Sherlock. There was a big contra dance festival this weekend that I wasn't going to miss (though I managed to forget it was coming this weekend until Thursday because my anticipation was so focused on Reichenbach).  I wasn't sure if I'd have time to acquire and watch the episode before I had to leave for the dance, and even if I had time I didn't want to be an emotional wreck when trying to dance.  Afterwards, I had volunteered to stay and clean up.  I didn't leave until after midnight.  Add in a 50 minute drive home and the time to acquire the episode and I didn't start watching until maybe 1:30 am. 

Of course I wasn't able to go to bed after watching that, not until I had read lots of LJ and tumblr posts to try to deal with all the emotions.  By the time I was ready to sleep, it was after 6 am and the sky was getting light in the east-facing window.  Thank goodness it's a three day weekend here in the US, so I could sleep for a few hours and not have to work.  That scheduling was very considerate of the BBC.

NO REGRETS.

I have thoughts about the episode!  Lo, they are spoilery. 


Basic reaction in gif form:





I didn't physically cry (I think I was too busy being shocked at the exact form of Moriarty's plot during the roof scene and thinking BUT HOOOOOOOOW after the fall), but my heart certainly went through the wringer. I spent a lot of time clutching a blanket to my face and muttering "fuck fuck fuck" into it.  Can we have a fandom group hug? Please?

Steve Thompson definitely stepped his game up from last year.  The one plot point that was really bothering me early in the episode--the preposterous notion of just  "a few lines of code" that could serve as a universal key to all computer systems--turned out to be a clever fakeout by Moriarty, hoodwinking both Sherlock and the audience. 

I can't even pick a favorite part.  The part that made me most unequivocally happy was Sherlock and John getting handcuffed together and running hand in hand.  There was grabbing of lapels and hand!porn.  Then Sherlock declared that they were going to jump in front of a bus, and John's only protest was a brief "what?" before he followed Sherlock.   He didn't try to drag Sherlock back, just trusted that Sherlock had a plan, and if it involved being hit by a bus, well, they'd do that together.  My shipper heart was all a-flutter.

Many of the other best moments were not a bit happy.  Martin Freeman's acting in the graveside scene just knocked it out of the park.  He's so clearly broken by this, but John's not the sort of man to completely fall apart in a public space.  Martin and Benedict delivered amazing performances throughout.  ALL THE BAFTAS.

Another favorite thing about the episode was Molly Epic Hooper.  (Yes, that is her real middle name.  Trufax.) She sees Sherlock, and more importantly she observes.  She understands the meaning behind changes in Sherlock's behavior that even John hadn't picked up on (though Sherlock was guarding specifically against John noticing.   Molly might count to Sherlock, but nobody counts quite as much as John.)  And even though Sherlock has never been much of a friend to her, Molly offers her compassion to him.  Then, like the BAMF she is, she helps Sherlock to fake his own death utterly convincingly. 

I've gone back and forth on how much of Sherlock's praise of her is genuine and how much is him being manipulative because he needs her help.  They're not mutually exclusive options, because Sherlock has no compunctions about manipulating the people he cares about.  Yet if you look at earlier actions, we never see Sherlock with other morgue workers, suggesting that he trusts her competence.  She got invited to the 221B Christmas party.  I bet John drew up the guest list, but Sherlock surely vetoed anyone whose company he detested, which is almost everyone.  So I'm going with mostly genuine.

The thing that upset and confused me was why Sherlock felt the need to tell John that he was a fraud who made up Moriarty.  I get that he had to hide his survival from John, because if John wasn't genuinely grieving then someone (like the remains of Moriarty's organization) might realize that Sherlock wasn't dead.  What I don't get is why he couldn't just tell John that Moriarty had set it up so he had to jump to save lives.  Even if Sherlock was having a sudden attack of empathy and didn't want to make John feel responsible, as he would if John knew that his was one of the lives Sherlock was placing over his own, he could have mentioned Mrs. Hudson and Lestrade.  Why try to break John's faith in him as well as his heart?  The assassins only cared that he jumped, not what he said to John (or so I'm assuming), and the media would make assumptions regardless of how John defended his friend.

Random theories I entertained during the episode:

-when John opened the envelope full of what turned out to be breadcrumbs, I initially thought it was wood shavings.  I assumed that Moriarty had taken Sherlock's violin and had it ground up.  And that's the story of why I was relieved when it turned out that all Moriarty did was kidnap some kids.

-for a brief moment during the rooftop confrontation, I think around the time Sherlock said that he was on the side of the angels but not one of them, I thought the way Sherlock was going to get out of Moriarty's trap was to enliven Moriarty's life by joining him as a criminal, making the world believe he'd gone bad.  The fall Sherlock faked would have been not a fall from a height but a fall from grace.  For that moment, my head exploded.  While I think this would have been an inspired twist on canon, I'm ultimately glad they went with the death instead.  If Sherlock had to really convince John he'd gone evil, not just say some words about being a fraud that John clearly didn't believe, it would have been even more heartbreaking than letting John think him dead.

I could type for many paragraphs more about this amazing show, but I think I'll leave it for now with this:  that hurt SO MUCH.  I think I'll watch it again tonight.

Also, go read this meta by joking, for it is made of truth.

Comments

[wendymr.livejournal.com]

I agree with this SO MUCH.

Though I believe that Sherlock lied to John about being a fraud because he really did want to break John's faith in him - because if John believed that Sherlock had lied to him all along he wouldn't grieve at his death. I really believe that Sherlock wanted to spare John the grief it's clear he knew John would feel.

Also, if John turned away from him and believed the lies just like everyone else, it would keep him safe.

It was an awful thing to do - and I can't imagine how it must have hurt Sherlock to do it - but he did it because he thought it was the best possible thing he could have done for John.

[mistyzeo.livejournal.com]

I loved the "few lines of code" thing. I spent the whole episode going, "wait, really? That's so easy!" Also the bus! And when John is holding Sherlock's cuff! omggggg.

[joking.livejournal.com]

-joins you in the fandom group hug- I'm so glad I didn't watch this alone. I hugged my friend and wept all over his shirt.

Re: those gifs you linked: I didn't think it was possible to ship them more than I already did, BUT I DO. I ship them LIKE BURNING. (I'm inclined to think it's non-sexual but it doesn't matter because it's Sherlock and John and they belong together forever and ever, amen.)

I agree that what happened with Molly was mostly genuine. Seriously, how often does Sherlock ask for help? Ever? He relies on John and Mycroft for help, but that's not asking because he knows they'll always help him. It must have been a monumental act of trust and vulnerability to ask Molly with help on something so important. I don't think it's purely because she's competent (though he obviously does believe she's competent). Sherlock doesn't show vulnerability that way, not to anyone who isn't John. And he is so very vulnerable in that scene. That's real.

I want to rewatch it too, but not yet. I don't think my heart can take it.

Also, thanks for the rec.

[irisbleufic.livejournal.com]

When John opened the envelope full of what turned out to be breadcrumbs, I initially thought it was wood shavings.

I thought it would turn out to be anthrax or some other toxic biological substance, which is why I hissed at the screen: "No, don't touch it!"

[mysticalchild_isis]

I wasn't sure what the breadcrumbs were at first, either. However, my interpretation was far more sinister. I thought ashes, and so when we got to the Hansel and Gretel bit, I assumed they were already dead... and had been burned in an oven. Sometimes my brain is not nice.

Martin Freeman in particular acted the hell out of that, but Benedict was also fantastic.

(I had some quibbles with the plot, but I don't want to be relentlessly negative in a happy space.)